things that happened today. (in no particular order)

woke up.
went to work.
worked.
came home.
played with the kids.
played with my gal renice.
ate dinner.
went to a friends house and watched a movie.
came home.
went on internet for awhile.
posted on my blog.
(the following is a prediction of what may yet transpire, results may not be accurate, this is not science, just speculation, author may have relied upon artistic merit or looked into a crystal ball)
went to bed.
slept.

What is brown and sticky?

















.........................a stick

all hot dogs go to heaven

this week's recipe. a.k.a. the perfect hot dog.(serves 2)
2 wieners per person, make sure the wieners are not frozen, throw them in a microwave for a minute. i generally use oscar meir wieners. regular, beef. byproducts, watch for bones...
don't use hotdog buns, that's lame. use presliced white bread.
slap some butter on the the slices (this prevents the bread from peeling off onto the wiener). don't warm up the bread, don't cut it, brown it or otherwize molest it.
1. heat up wieners,
2. butter bread
3. place wieners DIAGONALLY across the bread slices.
4. lay down a mustard stripe along the length of the wiener. about 4mm in width.
5. lay down a ketchup stripe ONTOP of the mustard stripe, about 4mm in width. same
length.

A couple notes about mustard and ketshup.
-did you not know, have you not heard, that mustard will separate if left for any amount of time in the fridge. therefore, it is vitally important that you prepare the mustard for service before you attempt to lay the mustard stripe. depending on what kind of mustard you have and what type of container you prefer. you will find that everyone has a preference when it comes to how to hold the mustard. the two modes are in a glass container with a widemouth lid. or a plastic squeeze type container with either a pop-top or twist style cone shaped applicator. When using the glass wide mouth container one can simply use a butter knife to "stir" the mustard to get proper mixtures. i don't recommend using this type of application b/c you can't lay down a nice stripe, and remember, appearance is everything. That being said, i like to use french's mustard, i think it's the best. but back to the point, to ensure the mustard is "mixed" before you lay down the stripe upon your fine wiener, you simply twist open the dispenser , hold it upside down and quickly motion the container rapidly up and down 1 or 2 times. you will see the liquid separation come out.
Ketchup is essentially the same, it separates, give it an upside down shake and you'll be in business.
Note about the spelling of ketchup; who cares....

So now we have cooked the wiener, prepped the bread, dealt with the mustard and red stuff, now what? do not attempt to wrap the bread around the wiener until you are prepared to eat it. This demands commitment. you must not have any other distractions. unless you are watching t.v. or listening to the radio. when you are ready to feast simply grab the corners opposite to the corners that have the wiener tips closest and with your thumb on one side and your pinky on the other simply pull the two corners up to fold around the wiener. you may have to go slow with this as to not break the bread or fold it in half. this takes practice and patience. you won't get it the first time. so relax. remember, the purpose of the butter on the bread is to hep keep the bread from crumbling, it will also prevent the bread from getting wet from the wiener condensation, and will prevent the mustard and ketchup from soaking into the bread causing further distractions.

Like i said, this takes focus and effort, but it like baseball, if you hit a homerun everyone will cheer, but if you stike out and smash yourself in the face with the bat, everyone will laugh.
enjoy the world's best hotdog.

something profound to think about.

this morning has been one of the most productive mornings ever. the reason for this is that i have developed what i think is the perfect pancake recipe. There are two parts to this formula. actually, three. The first is the ingredients, this is simple. all i use is some pancake mix (whatever kind you want), cinnamon, vanilla and water. Mix the pancake mix and water to a ratio of about 1-2. i cup of mix per two cups of water. This is crucial, you don't want it to look like water that has a tan tinge but still fluid enough that it spills easy when lifted with a gravy ladle. Make sure you wisk it so that there are no lumps of dry mix left in it. sometimes i wisk the dry mix first to break up any clumps. Then add the cinnamon and vanilla.

The second factor is the cooking, Next pre heat a skillet, pan whatever, on low to medium heat(4-5) glaze the pan with some butter but be careful not to burn the butter. Use a serving spoon dish out three pancakes, i prefer them to be about 4 inches in diameter, but that's up to you. they only take about 2-3 minutes per side, you have to babysit them abit but be careful not to destroy them, you'll know when they are done because the bubbles will burst and there will be a nice golden brown hue. the characteristics of a good pancake are that it's cooked right through, it has bubble holes which encapsulate the butter and syrup creating tiny little flavor packets of goodness. It has to have a nice golden brown color, and a brown eclipse of pancake crust around the perimeter to add the perfect amount of texture differential. Make sure you use two pans and alternate so you always have a steady flow of pancakes going. Another thing to watch for is the heat of the pan after you've cooked a bunch. when you make the second batch, the pan will be hot enough to burn the butter that you glaze the pan with , (i glaze every time) it is a good idea to hold the pan in the air away from the element and wave it a little in order to cool it down enough so the butter doesn't burn. Don't use water. Adding butter helps with flavor and prevents the pancake from sticking to the pan. griddles maintain a steady heat so burning isn't much of a concern.

The third piece to this puzzle of joy is serving and enjoying. They're is actually two parts to this as well, it depends whether you are making the pancakes for yourself or for others. But they're are rules that apply for both scenarios. In either situation, pre-heat a plate so it is just warm enough to maintain the heat of the pancake. This can be done by placing the plates in the oven on low heat, but only for a couple minutes, remember, all you want to do is take the chill away from the plate, don't burn your fingers. To serve a bunch of people you'll need to store the pancakes in the oven on low so that you can build up a supply to serve everyone at once. In my opinion, you should maybe then have three pans going. I find that a couple things happen when storing pancakes in the oven. They may condensate creating a rubbery texture, or if the oven is turned up to much, they might dry out. either situation is avoidable by simply cooking more pancakes at once. But remember to only store the pancakes in the oven just to keep them warm, no more than a couple minutes. In group settings, a griddle comes in handy. In a group setting you will also undoubtedly have more than just pancakes. There are some essential complimentary dishes to be considered. They include; bacon, eggs, ham slices, fruit, (strawberries, blueberries, bananas, peaches, pears), smoothies, coffee, milk, chocolate chips, marshmallows, food coloring for the festive occasions such as Christmas (green, red), or Halloween (black, orange)...your imagination is your limit. I also always use the classic butter and syrup as condiments.

The final scenario to consider is when you find yourself as the lone eater. In my opinion, to enjoy this breakfast when you are in lack of good company such as friends or family, a great substitute is the good ol' Saturday morning cartoon. prepare the pancakes, the coffee, and the bacon, this is where your skill will make or break you as timing is everything. Have the desired cartoon already playing, have the coffee ready sitting on the table beside the couch, have the blanket ready to cover your feet, and the remote by your side so you can flip through the channels and be the ruler of your own world as you enjoy the worlds best pancakes.